Are you ready?
Go with me, if you wish.
or
Stay where you are.
I don't give a #2 if you stay or join me! Ha ha! Yupp. Because, we're just friends, riiight?
If you have ever been the one to dump someone or the one being dumped, you have probably either said this or had it said to you.
Can we be friends?
HAH!
If you have had significant feelings for the other person or you were aware of the other persons caring for you, this is one of the most cruel things one person can say to the other. It's also, unfortunately, very common.
Then there are equally cruel derivatives:
We need to take a break.
I need a break.
I think we should see other people.
I'm trying to be honest with you.
We promised we would be honest with each other.
(WHAT?WHEN?)
Saying the odious phrase, "Can we still be friends" is like saying;
"Hey, your dog died, you can still keep it, pet it & pretend it's still going strong!"
In my personal experience when I have broken up with a guy, attempting to stay as friends, TO ME, this meant:
*Moving on, not calling him late at night or on his Birthday or holidays or ever.
*Getting rid of the "special clothes" I wore that he liked (Burning them works best)
*Taking a short vacay to "cleanse myself", to make new memories that don't involve him.
Again in my personal experience, the "guy version" of staying friends with an ex gf seems to go like this.
*Staying friends for when he needs an emergency BJ
*Calling or texting her a few weeks or months later "just to check on her. (this is actually very sweet)
*When he hits a "dry spell" in dating or becomes lonely, asking her on a friends date, type, thing.
Staying friends keeps the door open to come back if he wishes to, when he realizes he messed up.
Having had guys come back into my life months, weeks or even years later, I believe that round #2 can work. It can.
Only if, however, both people have matured, grown, changed, along with the "whatever it is" that caused the breakup before.
It can be different only if the 2 people are different. Best thing to do, in that instance, is to NOT talk about what happened before. Stay on a platonic level, minimal physical contact, until it's discernible to both what the other person's intent is.
Other than that, can we be friends?
(evil grin)
Saying the odious phrase, "Can we still be friends" is like saying;
"Hey, your dog died, you can still keep it, pet it & pretend it's still going strong!"
In my personal experience when I have broken up with a guy, attempting to stay as friends, TO ME, this meant:
*Moving on, not calling him late at night or on his Birthday or holidays or ever.
*Getting rid of the "special clothes" I wore that he liked (Burning them works best)
*Taking a short vacay to "cleanse myself", to make new memories that don't involve him.
Again in my personal experience, the "guy version" of staying friends with an ex gf seems to go like this.
*Staying friends for when he needs an emergency BJ
*Calling or texting her a few weeks or months later "just to check on her. (this is actually very sweet)
*When he hits a "dry spell" in dating or becomes lonely, asking her on a friends date, type, thing.
Staying friends keeps the door open to come back if he wishes to, when he realizes he messed up.
Having had guys come back into my life months, weeks or even years later, I believe that round #2 can work. It can.
Only if, however, both people have matured, grown, changed, along with the "whatever it is" that caused the breakup before.
It can be different only if the 2 people are different. Best thing to do, in that instance, is to NOT talk about what happened before. Stay on a platonic level, minimal physical contact, until it's discernible to both what the other person's intent is.
Other than that, can we be friends?
(evil grin)
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