AF

My oh my, how language is changing in todays world! Changing so rapidly, it's kinda fun to keep up with it or catch up with it as it evolves
and evolves
over and over.

Having served in the military, the United States Air Force, to be specific! It will sometimes come up in conversations with new people I meet in my day to day life.

Hey, I'm a friendly person, yet, not TOO friendly.

I remain open, yet, with healthy boundaries.

Since I have a Colorado phone number on my cell while I live in Texas, from time to time I get wrong number calls from people in Colorado.

If it were myself as the wrong number caller?

I would be slightly embarrassed.

For this reason, you know, the golden rule?

(Ya. The one with the most gold can make the rules) 😎

The golden rule which says that it's important to treat others as I would like to be treated.

So, I answer the phone, dude in Colorado has a wrong number.

Me: Hello

Dude: Hey Jenn, what's up?

Smart azz Me: idk, let me ask her!

Dude: Funny! ....wait, is this Jenn?

Smart azz Me: It can be.

Dude: O ya? How would that be.

Smart azz Me: Hmm. Is Jenn your mom? Your sis? Your wife? Your daughter? or....wait, your cat! That's it! MEOW.

(NO! I wasn't drunk it was 1300)

Dude: Naw. Jenn is just a really good friend.

Me: Mmm Hmm

Dude: So, where do you live in Colorado?

Me: Seriously, I moved to Texas a few years ago.

Dude: Whaaaa?

Me: Used to live there, kept the number. 2 much work to change it.

Dude: Military?

Me: Was AF

Dude: Real gung ho maggot, hmm?

Me: Whaaa?

Dude: Military AF.

Me: AF?

Dude: You know, Military as f*ck.

Me: Are you military?

Dude: Not AF. I'm in the Army at Carson. You?

Me: AF as in Air Force.

*CLICK*

I thought it was funny, the way the changing of language misconstrues communication. I don't know his name, he doesn't know mine.

The conversation was funny AF! 

Equinox & Elysium

Two powerful words!

Words are only words, you say?

You may say, if you wish, being a go with the flow girl  is my thaang.  :)

Being a go with the flow girl is healthy vs being controlling.

Oh, I will, for def, speak up when something really matters to me, yet, for the most part, am easy to please. Far from easy, just happy in my life, happy in the skin  I'm living in. 😁

The power of words is astounding!

The simple words, "I Do" or "I Will" are life altering.

The wagging tongues of gossip in a small town can do damage.

Saying, "I love you" vs saying "I don't love you" can often make or break a relationship of any sort or even break or build a person.

Equinox

Peeps! The word has some POWER!

Having had some powerful associations with this word, for *moi* this word has packed some power wield in life!

As of recent, the word Elysium has been catching me up in its' power!

Okay, so, I admit, it started with the movie of the same fame name!

Elysium is a Drama/ Science Fiction movie that came out in 2013.

Lucky 13 year! 🍀

Elysium is also, in Greek mythology, the name of paradise.

Those 2 references pretty much captured my attention, then!

As a lover of beautiful needlework, I googled the word, Elysium. It was semi surprising to get a boat load of Christmas crap! LOL!

Yeah. LOL! Christmas is less than a fave for moi!

Even so, the word, Elysium still holds its' magic. ✨

There is a bio company just on the horizon with the nomer ~

Elysium!

This company, OMGoodness, is making breakthroughs in health preservation. They definitely caught my attention! I'm witnessing, by trial of their product, Basis, history in the making!

Today is Day #1!

So excited to see what will happen!

Per chance, while out in South Lake Texas, I saw a bottle of liquid happiness that caught my eye!

It was by sheer chance that I liked the label, it was the word on the bottle which caught my attention!

Yup.

🌟 Elysium 🌟

Ice wine or Eiswein is absolutely delish!

Elysium Cady Muscat was in the Ice Wine section. It caught my attention!

The price was very reasonable, me thought!

The bottle was unremarkable, the label was different, pretty!

Just on a whim.....I bought 1 bottle. I wish I had bought 10!

It was a few days after bringing it home. Snowy, cold & icy outside, had slight "cabin fever". Being a bit doubtful while trusting my instincts, I carefully opened the bottle. Using a smaller glass than usual, I poured about 1" in the glass. I put my nose to the glass and could swear I caught a whiff of violets!

Doing the wine-snob swirl, then, a light sip.

Mon dieu! It started as tart then sweet then a soft finish of something floral.

YUM!

I was hooked!

If the angels were singing, I heard them!

Once more! Elysium scores.

Staying UP with it!

When everyone else was losing their shizz over the Superbowl ~ yawn.

I was watching Elon Musks human kind alterings ~ Falcon Heavy launch!

It was making history, it was furthering the history of the human history while a bunch of over-paid guys were playing with their oddly shaped balls & too many peeps were over excited over it.

Getting more excited over more significant events is my thaang.

Do you care?

You should!

Colonizing Mars is the future of humanity. Mars once had an ocean as big as the continent of the USA! Did you know that?

You're welcome!

If you wish to be stuck in the past, it's your bizz.

What will you do with it???

Check out mkaku.org

GO!

Musically

It's that song that peps ya', lifts a sullen mood into bliss!

You know what I'm talking about! um, don't you?

Working out is a joy for me. Many times I see (on FB) people saying they are glad when they've gotten their workout over, or got through it or "got it done".

Myself?

I feel that sometimes.

Mostly?

I love my workouts, being in the moment, feeling the first sweat then the trickle going down my back, down my legs (nope, it's not pee!). Then, the second sweat. The after-burn is the best!!!!

Love it!

The part that's hard, for me, is when I've expended all of my energy. My body gets tired when my mind wants to keep going! It may sound odd, yet, I feel a twinge of self disappointment.

It's only human to get tired especially in a gym, especially in a small one, such as mine. It's akin to feeling claustrophobic.

Google it!  😊

It's disappointing to me to feel tired, so tired I have to stop. I finish what I went to the gym to do, pushing through the fatigue. I would keep going for endless hours if I could.

When PT gets done with me, she has sapped my energy!

On my own?

It's the music, baby!

The music pushes me, gives me a smile or 20.

Specifically?

Anything by Coldplay!

Love Me Like You Do ~ Ellie Goulding

Make It Happen ~ Mariah Carrie

Say You Won't Let Go ~ James Arthur

All of Me ~ John Legend

I Wanna Be Your Lover ~ Prince

Talk Dirty To Me ~ Jason Derulo

Jealous ~ Nick Jonas

We're Going Home ~ Drake

Let Me Be Your Hero ~ Enrique Iglasias

Waka Waka ~ Shakira

Bailando ~ Enrique Iglesias & others

Just a few from my playlist that puts me in the mood ~ to work out!

These tunes are ones that motivate me, move me, keep me going to expend energy, power me through workouts.

They might work for you.

This music also puts me in "get going & get it done" mode, usually, when I need to clean the house, pack things to mail out. Anything that I have to do that requires a bit of motivating.

As one who has had to overcome some tough obstacles in life, it's always a desire, for me, to encourage others!

It's my sincere desire to help others to achieve their goals.

Find whatever it is that motivates you, apply it!

GO!

Do You Ever....

Do you ever reach out
To only reel in air
Do you
Do you throw it in like a towel
To send out some care
Do you ever?

And some will say it's life

The ones who are fortunate

The few

Could be me

Could be you

Most of us know too much rain

That's what is more often 

True

Do you ever reach within

That's where you will find

The treasures most often

In your own heart your own mind

What do you love? Who do you love?

If you've been along with me on my blog journey, first of all, thank you for reading! It amazes me, surprises me, that people take time out of their busy lives to pull my words up, taking time out of your busy days.

❤  Welcome!  ❤

It's my sincere wish that y'all feel welcome.

Secondly, if you've followed along, you will know of my fascination with the music as well as the musicians of Coldplay.

In a bid to keep me ever moving forward, I relied on music, still do. Listening to anything new, keeps me from the dreaded rut. AKA Stuck in the past, stuck in old ways, getting left behind.

Prior to Coldplay music enticing me along, I listened to any music that was new. I do mean any. LOL! Giving it all a listen to then adding to my playlist if it resonated with me.

Confession time!

My playlist was dominated by Keal'i Reichel as well as the soundtrack to Les Mis.

Hawai'ian music will always appeal to me. It's a part of me. Less of a part of me as I have journeyed to turn back into who I really am. Still, I will always love that genre.

With that ramble of intro, that's my story. 😊

The appeal of the music of Coldplay is as much about the words, the rhythm, the sweet feeling as it is about the 4 musicians in the band.

Even upon closer scrutiny, they seem to be stand up decent human beings with heart, with humility, sincerity. Very down to earth.

It's a personal preference for a guy to be reasonably clean cut. The guys of Coldplay are clean cut with that nice guy appeal that I love!

Yup.

The nice guy persona is my kryptonite!

Maybe because I'm a nice girl. I'm also strong, intelligent, self respecting, compassionate, intuitive yet can be a witch with a b when needed!

Oh, I know I'm also sensitive, can be moody, fight back with all of my might when someone has badly hurt me. 

Still, being kind is closer to my natural state of being.

The sense of emotional intelligence tells me that nice guys are the best. An emotionally unhealthy, insecure girl will catch her thrills with the bad boy sort of guy.

An emotionally healthy, secure girl gravs toward a nice guy.

The difference between a nice guy and a wimp?

The nice guy has self respect, self confidence while still being kind. The wimp will let almost anyone abuse him in any way they wish.

Nice guys rock!

The 4 musicians of Coldplay are nice guys. This shouldn't be confused with being perfect or without a bit of mischief.

Chris Martin is quite the cheeky monkey! Also quite entertaining when he's being his playful self.

With that long dribble, I want to say, I love the music of Coldplay!

Really?

You knew?

What was your first clue!

Here is a lesser known track from, guess who!

https://youtu.be/eV4DXAsx4LE

Chris Martin along with his band mates have been together for 20 years. With such great music, full of emotion, making people feel, I can see them being one of the greatest bands in music history!

I love flowers, love plants. Currently, I'm the happy owner of 2 beautiful bamboo arrangements, one vase of Valentine roses and a gardenia plant. The gardenia is a topiary with 8 small flower buds on it. 

Yes, I talk to my plants. It may matter to them or maybe I'm simply being silly. It matters to me. I love them, they make me happy!

Gardenia plants require a bit more attention than the usual house plant.

Having had gardenia plants before, I know how to take care of this shiny leaf beauty.

You know, don't treat it like a beast!  ;)

Something that's high on my list of loves is fitness. It's grown from a casual practice to a must have, part of my day.

Recently, I had to make some tweaks to avoid burnout. Still love it!

All of these plus more truly have an effect upon my well being, physical health, spiritual health.

Get to know yourself better. Ask yourself questions, constantly!

What do you need?

What do you love?

Who do you love?

History

To quote Coldplay:

In my place

Were lines I couldn't change

I was lost, oh yeah

I was lost

Crossed lines I shouldn't have crossed

I was lost, oh yeah

Yeah, how long must you wait for it?

Yeah, how long must you pay for it?

Yeah, how long must you wait for it?

I was scared, I was scared

Tired and under prepared

But, I wait for it

The writer of this popular ditty might just be my soul mate or at least in synch with my heart.

You might have to copy & paste. Jonny was moving a bit more, Guy gives some rare expression, Will has a bit more hair on his head it might make it worth it!  :)           

https://youtu.be/nvDqmsPdVUo
nvmnd. ha ha!

The words speak to me, the music causes stirrings in my soul. Stirrings because it's so relatable.

Can you relate?

There are lines I shouldn't have crossed.

Experience is a good teacher.

Legacy for Life

I lit a lilac scented candle
Poured a glass of pure water so fine
The scent of the lilac cheered me
Cool water on my tongue was divine
Life can be so very heavy
So predictably bleak
Tis only for the strong of spirit
Will crush that of the weak
Finding good cheer in flowers
Finding joy in sunshine or rain
Finding the sweetness of relief
When the body is released from pain
Taking delight in the plying of thread
Creating beauty where there was none
I shall find the silver lining in everything
Until the time comes that my days are done

Secret Squirrel Gifts

On Saturday, I received 2 deliveries from FTD. 

First, there was a text from FedEx, letting me know that my floral delivery was on its' way to me. Then, a second text. I thought it was simply an error, a duplicate of the first.

There was one delivery, then there was a second one!

Two!

Surprise! 

Then, a second surprise!

Whoever sent these beauties, THANK YOU! Really, it touched my heart to receive such beautiful, unexpected surprises. Thank you!

When I traveled to Edinburgh, Scotland in 2007 I spoke with a very intelligent, fascinating Scotsman on the flight to Edinburgh, who was visiting family in Scotland. He was living & working in Denver, Colorado.

I must have given him enough info, during our flight to Scotland, so that he could figure out where I lived as well as other details.

He was a true gentleman, yet he was at least 20 years younger than I was, I was newly divorced, didn't quite get the younger guy fascination with older women at the time.

He did ask for my phone number, etc. I didn't give it to him.

When I returned from Scotland I began to receive random floral deliveries. I had, in truth, forgotten about him. The floral deliveries continued to arrive right up until I moved to Texas in 2012.

Could he have found me? Could these beautiful bamboo plants be from him?

It's going to have my curiosity until I find out.

As a fan of botany, I KNOW these beautiful plant beings are more from the non-fruit bearing corn family. Just as Manchester Terriers are part of a clever marketing ruse as Miniature Pinschers or Min-Pins as they are commonly referred to, these ornamental corn plant beings are marketed as bamboo.

Close enough!

They're beautiful!

Chance Encounter

A fave colloquialism of ~ moi ~ is this - 

"You never know what tomorrow brings."

Indeed.

Tonight, I was cruising FB while racking up Swag Points, while listening to an account of the French Revolution on the Smart TV when I received a FB comment on a post.

Following the page for the town where I lived as a child in Michigan keeps me informed. They got 10" of snow! YIKES!

Glad I live in Texas!

I made a comment, a girl made a comment on my comment. So, it began.

When she asked me if I knew Julie Garten, I got chills & chicken skin!

Telling her that Julie was my younger sister, I asked her why?

She told me that they rode the school bus together and that Julie had just dropped out of sight one day. No one knew where she went.

I told her how I loved my sister with all of my heart.

Told her that my parents were quite cruel to my sister.

Told her that I had my lil sis come to live with me in Hawai'i when she was barely 15.

Loved her so much, I wanted to take care of her.

She had mental, emotional, psychological problems.

I STILL tried to take care of her.

My lil sis eventually returned to Michigan after graduating from High School in Hawai'i.

I didn't see her much after that. I was busy having & raising babies and moving all over the world for the next 12 years.

While living in La Republica de Panama', she sent a letter to me.

We began speaking on the phone regularly.

She wanted to get married, felt bad about shacking up for 7 years.

I told her I would bring my family to Utah & help with her wedding.

The man Julie married loved her so much. He loved her unconditionally.

He didn't care that she was 4'11", 600 lbs. He loved her.

To this day, I have never seen 2 people who love each other as much as my sister and her devoted husband.

They were married in a park on a summer day. It was beautiful!

Caveat ~ I love weddings! As long as I'm not the bride. :)

Julie and her husband were so happy together. They were so devoted to each other like no couple I have ever seen!

Julies' weight escalated. She was under the welfare medical care system. The doctor SHOULD have admitted her to a hospital to cause her to lose weight.

SHOULD HAVE.

Instead, the recommendation was a tracheotomy to "give her more oxygen."

When she told me this, I was living in Colorado, she was living in Utah.

That night, angels visited me, telling me to tell her she should not have this tracheotomy. 

The next day, I called her on the phone, I told her. She was going to go ahead with it anyway.

The day the tracheotomy was done, I got a call from Julies' husband. 

I thought he was calling to wish me a Happy Birthday.

He was calling to tell me that my little sis had died an hour earlier.

I was devastated!

Calling the airlines, I caught the next flight out of Colorado to Utah.

The last act of loving kindness I could do for my sister was to arrange a beautiful funeral for her.

It felt like I was such a failure.

I tried, o gawd, I tried to save her.

I couldn't save her.

It was a sad day. 

The chapel, where her funeral was held, was filled to capacity. She was very loved by so many!

Tonight, I told this woman who was kind to my sister during a tumultuous time in Julies life, what became of her. How she lived, her adventures, how she found her soul mate. How much she was loved by so many people that the chapel was filled!

She passed on in 2000. Her husband still has not remarried and tends my sisters grave with love. 

A chance encounter on Facebook. A modern marvel!

Doors

Open the doors to your heart
Open the doors to your mind
Amazement well apart
From that which you thought you might find

For the doors of the heart are so fragile

Weaker than those of the mind

Leaping opened quite agile

Leaving good sense behind

The luxury of falling so blind

Is only for the strong 

Sensibilities left behind

Whether right or wrong

It's the truly fortunate ones

Who find that love so true

Worth risking the long runs

On a few fragile "I love you's"

Promises, Promises

Some people love cardio.
Some people hate cardio.

I'm speaking of the heart pounding, sweat producing, driving, energy sucking, joie de vivre feeling of going hard for as long as a body can go!

Cardio, oh cardio, I love ye, I love ye!

People who know me will hear me say how much I love cardio. Tread, stairmaster, elliptical, stationary bike. Love all of it!

Love the first sweat that starts within 3 minutes. Love the ensuing sweat that soaks me from shoulders to knees.

It's a somewhat personal bit of info, so, I will tell if asked, mostly I keep it to myself.

An element which fuels love for cardio is this feeling of having learned to be totally inside my head during cardio. So totally inside my head that in my thinking, I am only a head on a body during cardio.
The body is a separate entity, doing the work.

The head? The mind?

It's receiving messages, inspiration, encouragement.

You can call the source of these messages whatever you like.

Since I started this fitness journey in 2004, I have received this message while engaged in cardio:

"Keep going, you can do this. Keep going, all shall be restored to you. Keep going, everything you need, all that you want will come to you if you keep going! So, keep going!"

This still, small, quiet while authoritative inner voice has spoken to me during my entire life. Mostly, I listen to it.

For this reason, in times of sadness, in times of a lack of motivation (very rare), in times of physical maladies ~ I keep going.

It IS happening. It's important to keep doing the work. 

Things are coming to me.

Good things are happening for me.

I keep going!

Affairs of The Heart

What do you think it is that makes a person into a soft hearted one? Are they born that way? 
Does life experience make them that way?

Maybe one, the other or a combo in differing percentages of both.

Maybe.

This is less searching for the answer, more like simple human curiosity.

Curiosity about all aspects of life are part of my basic character. When someone or something catches my attention, it feels as if whoever or whatever it is, is calling out to me. 

Come to me, find out why!

As much as possible, I do!

It's pretty much inevitable that when I investigate, there will sometimes be suffering.

This is a tough one for me.

People have told me that I have an almost masculine approach. When I find something that's broken, I feel a need to fix it. When someone tells me a problem they are having, it stirs me to try to help. Just listening is far from enough.

When  witnessing suffering, it stirs my heart into action, the body follows, the mind tags along with the other 2.

Being a sensitive, caring, empathetic intuitive can  be dangerous.

There are people who are readily willing to take full advantage of people who are kind.

Learning to rein it in has been a life lesson forged from trial & error, though, mostly error.

Painful error.

Life altering error.

Error that was a teacher.

Error to promote personal growth.

Soothing the pain, shaking the dirt off, remembering the lesson

This is the anatomy of the affairs of my heart.

Lessons for the mind.

*1* Unhealthy Habit Disappearing, Maybe 200 More to Go!

If you have read previous blog posts, you might be able to relate.

Are you tracking?

Well, dammit! Why not? 

Just playin'.

For too many years, I had a nasty habit of picking at the cuticles, the skin around my fingernails. 

Peeps, it was bad!

Bandaging my fingertips during the day with Neosporin helped, yet, during sleep, yeah. UGH! Waking up with bleeding fingers was awful.

It was ugly.

It was pain filled.

It was embarrassing.

Getting professional manicures was a 3 day at most, temp fix! Akin to putting a band aid on a 10 inch gut incision.

Yupp.

There was a deeper problem. It was about anxiety, fear, uncertainty.

Putting any number of reasons why were futile. As 2017 was nearing 2018, the decision that it was time to quit was key. 

Unhealthy habits are tough to break.

In 2017, it was time to gather some resolve!

It's working!

As I work with this awesome PT to improve health while improving physical appearance, it's also doing great things to quell anxiety, fear, general uncertainty.

Something more that is helping is to realize that I have to wrap my fingertips at night before bed, then, slightly less than before, during the day.

It may seem that this is a much smaller issue than it actually is, that there are people in the world starving, homeless, being abused plus even worse. Every person has to do what works for them. As long as they are doing right by others as well as themselves, it's okay.

Solving world peace, world hunger, it's out of my reach. Doing good within the town I live in is possible, so, that's what I do.

The air travel industry has the right idea when telling people to put their own oxygen mask on before helping others.

People must take care of themselves so that they can help others.

Each must take personal responsibility for themselves as much as possible. Having peace in your own heart, you can set an example of peace for others. Self sufficiency with personal accountability lends harmony to the home. Whether living alone or with others.

Charity begins at home.