Who

As a small child
I was told may things
Always focused elsewhere
Growing
Learning

As a teenager
Very unaware
Clueless
Becoming more self aware
With time

Adulting was new
It was so scary
It was so exciting
It was what it was
I was born ready for it

Now I had my own baby
Such a miracle to hold
So tiny 
So perfect
Had to be responsible

Watching my baby grow
Holding on
While letting go
A balance
I did it

Looking into my babys eyes
While suckling at my breast
Embracing to do my best
Only then did I realize
It was a challenge

Thoughts were now less of me
More of my care for this little one
How to fulfill duty laced with fun
Oh little baby what will you be
Much wonder

Now I have my answer 
Now I know the truth
You're a bright star in the universe
While still in your youth
I'm watching you, still

No longer A baby still MY baby
Pure potential living, breathing, loving

Where???

Close your eyes
Keep them closed
Feel your lashes flutter 
Where would you be
If you were not where you are?

If space or time were options
Would you be a baby 
In your mothers arms
On your death bed reminiscing
Somewhere in between

Would you be in the arms
Of a lover you regret leaving
Or sailing on the ocean
Cuddling your first born
Would you be taking marriage vows

If you were anywhere in the world
Walking under the Tour d'eiffel
Floating in a salty warm ocean
Scaling mountains
Or speeding down one on skis

Would you be cuddling your dog
As a puppy once more
Where would you be
What would you be
Would you do it all again, differently

Life is full of variables
Outcomes vary
According to our decisions
When we choose to do something
We also choose to not do other things

Choose carefully
This day
This hour
This minute
This is the rest of your life

Timing

You have seen them.

You might even be one.

Maybe even in the near future.

The people who have an 80 year old face with the hair color of a 25 year old.

Keep your britches from bunching up. Ha ha!

Often, I will see mostly ladies who have very obviously dyed hair. It's easy enough to discern. Most people will be in a natural shade of some other hair color besides blonde once they are 50 or 60 or 70 or 80 or 90....
Because of the marvels of drug store hair color products available at $10 or less, anyone, guys and girls can be free of grey hair until the day they die. They can even be buried with dyed hair.

Shout out to Just For Men & Grecian Formula!

Girls do it, guys can do it, too!

It's a more sensitive topic than many people realize. Grey hair color is an indication of a lady or gentleman of "a certain age". 

So, when is the right time to allow the grey hares (ha ha) to take over? The answer is that it's very personal & individual.

FYI ~ Ageism is alive and the last form of discrimination which, while it is illegal, is openly practiced in the USA as well as the entire world.
Ageist attitudes, while it can be aimed at younger people, it is most often aimed at people over the age of 40.

Age shaming is rampant in the world.

Fat shaming? That's a no-no.
Racial comments? Better not!
Disability comments? Danger, danger!
Ethnic negativity? Just say no!
Calling someone "Grandma"? Sure, go ahead, it's so funny. NOT!

Hence, having grey hair marks someone as being older. Not only older, but unattractive, no longer viable. Moreso for women.
Oh, I'm speaking of the natural greying in a person's hair. The hair on their head, eyebrows, eyelashes, etc.

Not talking Christian Gray, lol, he's uber hott!

The trendy Salon Silver that many who are in their 20s & 30s, no.
It's so obviously artificial coloring. It's trendy, it's soooo cool!

Many people who went silver temporarily, will go back to whatever their "natural" color is, when being silver is no longer in style.

That sexy silver is viewed as trendy, fashionable, very sexy! The natural greying that occurs with age, most often starting at the temples is often a mark that a person is "just old", "too old", "grandma".
At that time, many women begin their descent into invisibility. They are discounted as less valuable by society unless they have attained high financial status, professional status or social status in the eyes of the world.

Men, on the other hand, although most don't take care of their skin, hair, bodies, minds, spirits as most women do, are viewed differently. An older man with grey or silver hair is viewed as still attractive. 
There are a few guys whom I know personally, who dye their hair, take care of their skin, maintain muscle tone, regularly nourish their spirits. Very few, yet there are a few. These anomalies may do one or two of these or all four. Good on ya dudes!

As I move on through time, as in, I consider myself a life long learner. Am always doing the grav toward anything new, I keep my spirit renewed with every day.

Eventually, as I flow in the river of life, the river of time, I will, fearlessly, completely transition from strawberry blonde to completely grey & silver. 

Rocking it like a silver VIXEN!

Becoming older is optional, I will flow in the river of time.

484 Then Nothing

You can stay calm, self assured. Your secrets are safe.

Unknown Region

My #1 reader was from "Unknown Region", then, a curious event transpired. After 484 visits to my blog, Mr or Ms Unknown Region dropped off of my readership 3 months ago. 

In truth, I enjoyed your readership, the messages you sent. 

The mystery was the whipped cream on my pumpkin pie!

Where ever you are, I hope you're safe, happy, finding love.

Stop in again, sometime. You're always welcome to visit.

Peace out!

The One

You will truly know the love that can rip you apart
When you have loved another with all of your heart

A special someone who has become your very best friend
Your confidant to trust in with mutual devotion without end

When you know them just by the alluring scent of their skin
Left behind in the room in the chair they were sitting in

The sound of their voice is enough to make your heart pound
From then to now it has become your favorite sound

A glance from them a smile or the very slightest touch
When a beloved one is near it doesn't take very much

Their laughter may be a bit to loud or a rough grating sound
It's still so good to hear them being happy when they're around

The clothes you wear which they have loved to see, to touch
Become your favorite clothing that you want to wear so much

Their music becomes your music as yours becomes theirs
Everything meshes everything flows without putting on airs

The moments of being apart seem to last almost forever
Make it so much better when you two come back together

This is the anatomy of the joining of two souls when they unite
This is how it feels when you know it's right then it's so right

Inside Me

Inside me is the little girl who only wanted love from a mom & dad

Still alive are the fears along with the hopes & dreams she had

A beating heart that is made of love with a fierce little soul

Who has gone to hell then back still fighting to again be whole

Going strong is the teen girl who was shaped then hurt by the military

Adding onto all the secrets some of which I still must carry

Part of me is still a mother who only desires to hold her child

Rock them to sleep once again with such pure love undefiled

As a lover a romantic a dreamer of dreams all rolled into one

Child like still who sometimes only wants to just have fun

Still a little bit lost at times as to what it is I should or shan't do

Letting intuition guide me with an inner voice that's always true

Controlling my thoughts and body so that I can live my dreams

It sounds so simple yet it's more complicated than it seems

Taking life one day at a time swinging it around by the tail

When the winds of change arrive I reach up then adjust my sail

Do you remember me?

Do you have good recall?

Perhaps, selective recall?

Maybe involuntary recall?

Possibly a combo of all three?

Congrats! This means that you are most likely genus homo sapien. 
Human.

Being born with excellent memory recall, it's a combination of all three. As such, I remember almost everything starting when I was 8 months of age. These are clear, distinct memories. Color, sounds, scent, sight. All of these are imprinted on my memory. 

With that said, I remember people. Some people, I force myself to forget for various reasons. Most, I remember for a long time. I still have a whole life ahead of me, yet, I'm quite sure I will remember those I choose to remember for the rest of my life.

Today, I was surprised. Three times. Must be a charm.

On August 2, I left Texas, drove to Colorado to help some friends. So, I have not been in Texas, out & about for almost 2 months. This morning I went to the local gas station to fill the tank on my car.
I love my car!
There was a gentleman who I knew when I first moved to Texas in 2012. He was in his 90s, wealthy, he wanted me to marry him so he could leave everything he had to me. Integrity sometimes sux!
I couldn't do it.
The sweet lady at the gas pumps was someone I intruduced him to. I with-hold judgement. She went for it, he died in 2013. She's now a wealthy woman, set financially for life. I was happy for her. She thanked me over and over for introducing her to him. It made both of them happy for the amount of time he had left with her. She told me that she thinks of me often & wishes me well.

In truth, I had put it to the back burner in my memory. It made me happy that her decision had gone well for both of them. She's a sweetie!

I continued on my day. 

I stopped off at the supermarket which was continuing their low price on a workout supp I use when I need it. I was really happy that the price was still $10. lower than the usual.
Visually scanning the shelves, I heard a voice behind me that I had not heard in a long time. It was someone I knew when I lived in Jacksboro, a small town just 25 miles down the road from Graham, the small town I live in. We spoke for a few moments, did a short catch up. He and I had gone out a couple times, there was zero compatability on my end.
I had not seen him since 2012.
He told me that he was surprised that a "girl like me" was still single.
In truth?
I was surprised that he remembered me, voiced that thought. So, he told me that I was someone he would always remember. Curious.

Many things are more available as well as lower priced in Newcastle, a town just 14 miles from Graham. I went there, today.
When I walked in the door, the guy working there said "hello" recognized me by my name as well as that I had spent August & part of September in Colorado.
It was a pleasant surprise.
To be truthful, many people tell me that I'm very memorable.
It blows my mind!
In my heart, in my mind, I'm a simple, small town girl from Michigan.

When people remember me, it slightly baffles me.

Remembering everyone I choose to remember & everything I choose to remember is a part of me. A part of who I am.

It amazes, catches off guard. It also flatters me a little bit.

Maybe, I will be remembered favorably by a few.

I hope so.

Close to The Heart

People have, at times, told me that I hold my cards close. Because of experiences in life, it became necessary to be slow to trust. Although I am friendly, caring & compassionate, at the same time, I'm also a rather private person.
My home is my sanctuary.
People may come in, if they have a reason such as helping me with something in my home like repairs, estimates, etc.

For the most part?

In the past, I rarely allowed anyone besides family or friends I had known for a long time to visit me. It takes a lot of trust in someone to let them come inside my home. Very few people have enough of my trust to let them enter my home. 
All the way inside, that is. Anyone who was invited to my home was already inside my heart.

When I saw the inside of the house I'm living in, now, while I was still deciding, for the first time, the one feature that I loved was the front entry.

The house had, at one time, an open air front porch. Now, that entire area is enclosed. Where the main front door used to be, there is a door that can be closed, essentially, closing off access to the main part of the house.

Perfect!

When a FedEx Delivery, a Floral Delivery or food delivery is made, the delivery person can come inside. When it's raining or too hot or any inclement weather they are sheltered without entering the main part of the house.
Being private can also be courteous. I do, however, keep a charged taser at my side, just in case I need it. 

Although I don't put photos of loved ones up on the wall as it hurts too much to miss them when I see a photo. From living in different parts of the USA as well as the world, I have some very unique items that tell the history of my life so far.

Some items are from Japan, Germany, France, Republic de' Panama' plus some from Hawai'i, Colorado, Nebraska, Michigan.

Quite a mix!

There are mostly hand crafted items on a high quality scale. The difference between the items I have vs just having items or "things" is that I actually went to or lived in those locations to obtain the items. Many were gifts, some were purchased.

There are sentimental items such as furniture made by my beloved Maternal Grandfather. A gift of an alabaster sculpture from Italy, who it came from, you will have to wonder. 😇

The sanctuary which is my home for now, is here just for me as well as an occasional visitor. People who know me well, know that I keep a guest room ready 24/7. I do request a minimum of 24 hours notice so that I will be in town.
I do love to have visitors. One of my "visitors" is a very cool guy friend, he keeps a toothbrush in my bathroom, lol!
Just a good friend. Yeah, he's hot, very interesting. Still, a friend.
Nothing more, nothing less. 
He has good dental hygiene. Ha ha!

When I first moved into this house, it looked so good! I admit, I have lapsed. It's time to bring it back to my standard.

Do you have any quirks? 
Eccentricities that people know about you?

Share if you dare!

Peace out.