Have you been hurt?
Emotionally? Physically? Spiritually? Psychologically?
Being a sensitive, intuitive girl, emotional pain is something I know all too well.
Speaking of it can be cleansing, speaking of it too much can cause that "stuck in a rut" feeling.
Do you know why?
Speaking of your pain, telling the same sad story over, then over again, is like digging in the dirt. Telling of the pain over and over causes a slow aging of the mind, of the body. Digging ones own grave a teaspoon at a time.
I have done this, we all do it! It's human to do so. Over time, I have been trying to do it less. Maybe this is the key to unlock the door which leads to a happier, lighter, brighter mindset. Maybe! Just maybe it does. Sounds good to me. DUDE!
What I propose, here, is to tell a different story. Tell of how someone loved you. Concentrate on how it felt to have something truly wonderfully unexpected happen. Remember what it feels like to fall in love.
My Aunt May says, "People don't fall in love, they fall in horse shit, most don't know the difference!" So funny!
I happen to love horses!
A few of my happy memories include, yet, are not limited to:
My Grandfather, Sherman Kendall, dressing me in a soft pink ruffled dress at 6 yrs old. He would then, french braid my to the waist, long, strawberry blond hair with his large calloused hands in preparation for taking me out to the local ice cream shop for a parfait. He would be humming "Take me Out To The Ball Game" or "You Are My Sunshine." He had very large hands, calloused from working his magic with wood. Turning aged chairs, tables & bed frames into beautiful works of art with his restoration of them.
Having raised 5 daughters, he knew how to tame my baby fine, wild hair into a coif that was infinitely more presentable.
Horses have always fascinated me. There was a family who had bought some of the land that my father owned right behind my parents home. They had horses, yet, not enough time to ride them.I was 10 years old at the time. Was a country girl, extremely shy around people. Felt more safe with horses. This family let me ride the horse that belonged to the lady of the house who worked in real estate, was always working.
Buttermilk was a spirited palomino gelding. He didn't like to walk or trot. he loved to canter. When I relaxed the reins, he would do an all out gallop, then a RUN! He was such a wonderful horse! For 3 summers the familys' daughter, Diana and I rode together around her parents' acreage. Then, her parents divorced, she moved away with her mother, the acreage, the house were sold. And the horses. Yet, the summers spent, cantering with Buttermilk, my heart racing, my hair flying in the wind, live in my memory.
The house that I live in is the newest, most beautiful home I have ever lived in. On my lunch break from teaching as a sub teacher, I remember seeing the "For Rent" sign that the owner was putting up. My heart rate quickened as I wrote the number down, then called for an appointment to see it. The outside looked so nice, it seemed that the inside might be just as beautiful!
I was so excited to see the house at 4 pm. The house was more beautiful than I had though it would be. It had been gutted, then totally remodeled. Granite counter tops, Italian tile in the large bathroom. Wood flooring throughout. By 5 pm, he had my deposit, I had the key! Moving my possessions to this beautiful house was something of a mystery to me, yet, I felt that it would happen, one way or another. The OSB Singles are a great group. They volunteered to move me!
Laying in my bed, that night, in this beautiful house, looking around, it felt as if I was dreaming, so happy! A sweet feeling of contentment lulled me to sleep.
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Tell your own happy stories to yourself inside your head. Talk to yourself as if you were speaking with someone you love. Positive self talk is so very POWERFUL! Filled with POWER to create your greatest happiness. Your most wonderful life.
Happiness.
Get some!
GO!
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