When is enough......enough?

It's a heartbreaking refrain.
Hearing other single girls remark of themselves.

If only I was:

*Thinner
*Prettier
*Smarter
*Cleaner
*Richer
*More Sexy
*Darker Skinned
*Lighter Skinned
*Taller
*Shorter

If only I had:

*Bigger breasts
*A smaller butt
*More money
*Clear skin
*A smaller nose

Cosmetic surgeons live off these insecurities.

All this, many girls believe, would attract & keep their dream man to them.

Try telling them that the wrong guy will pick away at your insecurities. The one who truly cares about you, just as you are, will love you for or in spite of what the girl perceives as her flaws. Feel the display of doubt emanating from them.

And me?

The ex huzz told me:
"You're all used up after having 4 babies. Any guy out there will fuck you, none will ever love you, you have no choice, you have to stay with me or be alone for the rest of your life."

Thanks, honey!

Yet, it's been 10 years since I left & divorced him. His verbal, sexual & emotional abuse was so bad, I paid for the divorce out of my own pocket. I would have sawed off my right arm to get away from him.


Although I believe his words to be false, I'm still single.

Personally, I know I have a lot to offer, I know I AM enough for any guy out there, sometimes.....
I think I'm too much, even for myself. 😸

Looking at the history of women who are perceived as very desirable:

Marilyn Monroe
Britney Spears
Ivana Trump
Marla Maples
Selena Gomez
Sandra Bullock

These diversely talented femmes attract scores of guys, yet, keeping them is another matter. The guys they chose treated them badly. It's more of a reflection on the guys than it is on these women. Maybe choosing guys poorly if anything.
Does it diminish them?
NO!

When one person (male or female) rejects, cheats, abuses, leaves. It says more about the perp than it does of the victim.
Every situation is different.

Often, it's better, indeed more healthy, if someone has a history of people who abuse them in various ways, better to take a break of 90 days from mating & dating. It's best to see why they are choosing someone who does this.

It seems best for that person to work on themselves so that they will learn to choose better people to ally with.

Many people, in today's world, start out with sexual activity by age 12, then, recycle partners from then forward.
A human brain with emotional maturity, is only fully formed at age 25!

When a person becomes sexually active at an age when their thought processes are still undeveloped, it sets them up to not know who they truly are. It sets them up to have the deep fearfulness of being alone with no partner in their life.

Society is a hindrance to people truly knowing themselves.
Easier to control the population when people are living in an emotional climate of fearfulness. Add to this, the insidious social stigma attached to being single as being a negative way to live.

The people who are mentally, emotionally, even spiritually strong enough to remain happily single are a considered rare, a pariah to be looked at as an oddity. 
In truth?

Letting yourself be single for a long stretch of time is a gift for you to work on yourself. This allows one to stay in touch with who you are without the chimeric tendency to absorb personality traits of a significant other.

The message?

Who you are is enough. The right person will recognize this.

Peace out!