The Change

This is just an observation by "moi", lil meeee.

It has come to my attention, recently that there are an increasing number of guys who are marrying women for their money & status.

I can name 8 guys right now, who I know personally, who are living in this sad conundrum. 

Whether because of student loans, divorces or general lack of ambition, these guys are saddled with women who they don't love. Dependent on women who they depend on for money, food & a place to lay their head down. Maybe they learn to love the life of ease & comfort, yet, not the women whom they are legally tied to.

The guy may fear the stigma of divorce or he may fear the amount of money he will have to pay in alimony, child support, division of property. Therefore, he remains tied to her. He may have lived the pain of an absent father, not wanting to create the same situation for his own sons. Living in a loveless and/or sexless marriage. 

It's clear to outsiders that if the woman lost her status, her money or her power of the almighty dollar over him, he would be gone. There would be not enough to keep him tied to her.
It's obvious to everyone, though he may think others are fooled.

It seems to me that it's part of the power shift that many guys, unwittingly are facilitating.

In the past, it was nearly always the women who would marry and stay for the financial security & stability the male spouse provided which she was unwilling or incapable of gaining for herself. 

The guy may have been unattractive, overweight, uninteresting, yet, the lucrative lure would draw her in. Sometimes she learned to love him, most often, she did not.

As one who loves men, nearly everything praiseworthy about men, I find this so very sad. It may be the changing of times, yet, it's a sad change.

It's a castration of what it means to be a man, not just a male, born with higher testosterone and male genitalia.

It seems to me to be a sad existence where the guy is caught in a struggle of living a life of financial ease & status while dealing with the absence of regular sexual satisfaction as well as emotional satisfaction. Self compelled to remain sexually, emotionally faithful to retain financial status & social status.

While women have dealt with this more often than not, since the beginning of time. 

Guys, not so much.

As I see this trend being the case more and more frequently, it makes me sad to see.

Then, again, it's all about choice.

Friday musings.

Aloha!