Coming up! June 26 - Happy Birthday!

This time of year is bittersweet for me. Sunday would have been Michaels 36th Birthday.

*heavy sigh*

What would our lives have been like if he had lived? If he were still here, with me. Most likely we would be celebrating a wedding anniversary, living in Georgia near his family. We would have been living in a custom built home, maybe 2 children & a dog or two.

Can you feel the heaviness of my heart?

Add to this, my own Birthday is coming up on July 14. Birthdays are difficult for me, yet, not for the reasons that they are difficult for many people. Hashing over it is irrelevant. I'll just say, it's a wound from my childhood compounded by a selfish ex huzz.

I'm a bit melancholy at this time of year. Just like any day that's supposed to be happy, a celebration, my Birthday usually amounts to a flat nothing.

What I have wanted, all I have ever wanted was friends who care around me, a cake & the Birthday song. A gift or 2 is not necessary, yet, it would be nice. What IS important to me is to have a celebration ON THE DAY. Not the Saturday before although it would be better than the Saturday after,

Having a celebration the Saturday before is better as it's leading up to the day.

Having a celebration the Saturday after is kinda like a crappy little plastic gumball machine ring instead of a real gold & diamond ring.

The day has passed, it's over. Most people wouldn't wait a week after Christmas to celebrate it.
Having even a small luncheon or a small dinner right on the day is better than doing it after. The celebration kinda loses it's glitter, for me. Yeah - Yeah, I know. It's personal, it's how I feel. My Birthday, my feelings about  it. :P

This time of year, I think of June 26 and July 14.

Oh what a difference the absence of a loved one makes.

If your Birthday is June 26 ~ Happy Birthday!

If your Birthday is July 14 ~
Happy Birthday & Happy Bastille Day!

Bon soir.