The Truth, Right here, Right Now!

The truth is, I'm completely alone in the world, I have to be okay with that

The truth is it's past Thanksgiving, almost Christmas and it sucks to spend it alone!  ~ 

BIG TIME!

The truth is that I would rather be a suicide statistic than alive, yet, I'm still here

The truth is that my body is getting smaller, more lean, my thoughts are positive, my mind is peaceful while my house is a mess!

The truth is that, although I would love to have a man in my life, I have been hurt so many times that I no longer trust it if it has a penis.

The truth is that my creative juices have begun flowing after being dormant for 8 years

The truth is that I would rather help anyone else besides myself

The truth is that I feel like I'm growing younger 

The truth is that I love my breasts! They still look awesome! 100 chest presses every day

The truth is that I am happy that my ex huzz has become obese. After so many years of him putting me down and criticizing others for weight gain, he's gained a lot of excess weight that he can't control. His gut looks like he has a basketball under his shirt. Ha ha! So funny!

KARMA!!!

The truth is that as my weight drops while I become stronger, more lean, it's scary. Being porky meant that I didn't get much attention. Fat insulated me from the world.

The truth is that I would rather stay at home 90% of the time yet I force myself to get out.

So, with all this raw uncensored truth, it feels like a large burden has been lifted off my shoulders. It makes me feel free or maybe more free because I don't know who is reading this. There are rarely comments. *That wasn't a request for comments*

My BLOG has almost 2,000 views, only 9 comments on a little over 135 entries. Pretty sukky numbers! Ha Ha!

I write for the release of tension, creativity, getting the words out of my head, semi anonymously. Whatever the serotonin uptake, endorphins, mind quieting my workouts don't take care of, writing a BLOG does the rest. 

Do you need that?

I need that.

Deciding to be happy a long time ago with whatever means possible is my way of life that works for me. The same thing might not work for others, it sure works for me. So, I have been creating some really awesome things at home. Beautiful mermaids, simply elegant letters, sweet little bunnies and froggies that have turned out in a surge of cuteness! I finish a project, then, place it on my dining table so that when I get up the next morning, it's there, for me to look at with new eyes and feel the happiness, the joyfulness of creating something beautiful.

It's almost 2016. In 9 months a new person is fully formed.

SO START!

Start working out again!

Decide to do one thing every day that makes you happy. Hell, do 10 if that's what it takes.  :)

There's a feeling in my heart that 2016 is going to be a wonderful year, full of more happy things than ever. It feels as though my life is going to be hit with a tidal wave of  HAPPY!!!!!!

Stay tuned.

Laters, baby!