When Someone Loves You, You Know IT!

It's a fine, delicate line. Many people are very tough to read. Crossword puzzles can be fun.

Rubiks Cubes can be fun.

Playful riddles can be fun.

People puzzles, less than enjoyable.

Most babies are born into a world that is a warm protective bubble. They are loved, protected, all of their needs are met when they have correct parenting. They are bathed in love, adoration, again, when they have correct parenting.

Unfortunately, not all of us, have that correct parenting. I know I didn't have much of a good start in life. Gaining insight, then learning those valuable lessons to keep myself safe, happy, growing, was a painful, time consuming rebirth of sorts. Intense psycho analysis, intense therapy. I got myself straightened out while my children were still almost babies so that I could give them the loving care that is every child's birthright. The tender sweetness of loving them, nurturing, teaching, guiding, showing them the pathways to strong, healthy, confident adulthood. They would need this in a world that can be hostile, cruel, dangerous, hurtful.

Having not had that nurturing environment, I had to spend a great deal of adolescence on into early adulthood, learning many very painful lessons.

There are many predatory people who have an innate sense of others who are more vulnerable to their methods. As a girl in her 20s, the predatory instincts of males to copulate with just about anyone or anything that was suitable often sought me out. I learned, early on, to turn the predators away. Often they became violent, insulting, vindictive, when I called them out. The female predators were not much better. When I was AD USAF, a room-mate robbed me before moving out. I didn't think she would do that, thought that my Supervisor or First Sgt would help me get my money & property back. 

Nope.

From that time, forward, I stopped trusting males, locked everything up from room mates.

Leaving the dating pool to become a wife & mother, I was sheltered from that. There was a proverbial "lion at the gate" who provided for many needs as well as the needs of my children.

Even he, ultimately, turned into another male who I was a fool to trust.

Going out into the world, on my own, once again, I had forgotten the lessons I learned about predatory males as well as predatory females. The world has definitely become more harsh than it ever was in my initial single days.

Having to re-learn all of those lessons plus the even more harsh reality of the present day was painful. People who are married, think it's okay to date. Sometimes lying about their marital status, sometimes not lying about it, yet, still ensnaring others just the same. It's a scourge upon the earth, when people perpetuate such harmful actions upon others. It causes a great deal of harm, pain, emotional distress. Dark spots upon the souls of others, already struggling to keep their sanity, their trust in others is destroyed.

When a child has correct parenting, they have their instinct intact to be able to discern who the predatory people are. They learn to avoid such evil so that they may grow & mature safely.

This knowledge has come back to me. Having not had the correct parenting, and now, having relearned & added onto those lessons I learned in my 20s. It has brought me to the realization of discernment as to who is truly benevolent as well as to avoid those who are not. There are also many levels of benevolence.

An old song seems to sum it up:

Some of them want to use you

Some of them want to be used by you

Some of them want to abuse you

Some of them just want to be abused

Or the way Deepak Chopra says it:

There are those who want to hurt you

Those who want to help you

Those who simply leave you alone

It has taken time, many experiences, yet, I have learned to only turn to those who wish to help me.

Deepak Chopra says:

Those who want to hurt you only want what they can take from you or will accept everything from you. They want you to stay the same without growing or changing as this suits them and their purpose, yet, leaves you stagnating.

Those who leave you alone, care not whether you are suffering. They are only concerned with themselves.

Those who want to help you will acknowledge your suffering, will help you in whatever capacity they can even if only to offer a listening ear or a shoulder to lean on. They will do as much as they can within their capacity to help not only you, but, others as well. I feel it necessary to add that they will lend help & support in person when possible, on the phone is a poor substitute, yet, second best.

Wise words.

When someone truly cares about me, as a person, with no methods employed to get what they can from me such as sex,money, possessions, care taking, etc, I know they truly care. This shows more about them than it does about me or really any other person who has whatever need.

I go toward those who genuinely care.

I have a "puppy principle."

More on that, next time.

Stay tuned.

*smile*