The Month of May

Here we are.

It's the month of May.

The month of ~ yep ~ Mother's Day!

Recently, there was a conversation, which I heard, where 2 women were speaking of the condition of being a parent of adult children. One of them said something that rung very true!

She said:

"The way that you know if you truly had the love of your children is how well they keep in touch with you when they have moved out, away from parents, to start their adult lives.
If they REALLY loved their mother, they would be in contact. Their mother would not receive the hurtful silences for weeks, months & even years at a time."

This is true.

Myself?

I have had to endure this pain of adult children who don't call, nor email nor contact me unless they need something or want something from me. This has stretched into weeks, months, even years at a time. It's very telling. It hurts so much that I have had to refrain from having photos of my children on the walls of my home or in frames sitting on furniture. As much as my eldest daughter expressed desire for me to be a part of HER children's lives? It's impossible for me to be a part of her children's lives when she only comes around at her convenience.
I will maintain my dignity by only accepting the love & respect which is due for a mother, refusing to be treated as a convenience item to be picked up at leisure. 


Only 1 of my 4 offspring keeps in touch. Although her life is very busy, she still calls me every Sunday, visits when she can. 
She doesn't HAVE the time, she MAKES the time.

This principle can be applied to any relationship. A romantic relationship, parent - child, friendship.

No one is so busy that they don't have the time to maintain a relationship. How much they put into a relationship for you tells you where you are in importance to their list of priorities.

I only make someone a priority commensurate with how they treat me as a priority. As painful as it is, it's settling from searing pain, to a dull ache that 3 of my children disregard their mother.
Soon?
The love I pour into the one child who does care will be my focus.

In  time, the ones who don't care will fade from my heart.

It's their choice.

As hard as it is, for me, the choice is out of my hands in that aspect of life.

What is in my arena is to choose to be happy, no matter what!

Happy Mother's Day!

Choose happiness!