Are you a giver?

Yeah, you know what this is about. If you don't know, then, most likely, you're less of a giver.
No worries!
No shame, this is a guilt free zone.

The anatomy of the mindset which makes a person more of a giving person seems to be more complex than it appears to be on the surface.

Many people who give to get will say that doing something for others is like pissing in a pair of black pants. You get a warm feeling, yet, no one notices. It can also begin to stink after awhile if you're doing it for all the wrong reasons.
Others give out of a need to feel wanted, needed.
Sometimes there is the "super friend" approach. Someone wants to be a friend or more to someone, so, they buy gifts, do enormous favors, shower the other person with compliments.
All of this they do, to gain approval.

Sometimes this works. Most often, it leaves the one who is giving for all the wrong reasons, with nothing, plus the feeling of being drained of energy, hope. Leaves them with cold pricklesvs warm fuzzes.

Their umwelt is skewed.
aka
They're mentally/emotionally screwed! 
Many of these poor unfortunate souls (ala Ursula!)blame others when, in reality, they do it to themselves.

The healthy approach, is to give to yourself, first. Even the air travel industry tells people the simple principle of putting your own oxygen mask on FIRST during an emergency before trying to help others.

Fill your own well before you offer water to others.

For these very reasons, it is very healthy to have constructive hobbies.
Hobbies are for the pure pleasure of doing something for the self. It gives back as it's own raison d'etre.

For givers?

Hobbies can be crucial to mental health, personal happiness, replenishing the mind, body, even the spirit.
This strikes a balance between giving to the self as well as to others.
Balance is key.

This is a tough lesson to learn for us, givers.

Yup, I'm a giver and I know it. :)

I have a few hobbies that replenish my soul, make me feel good. People will receive anything and everything you want to give them, they may give back occasionally. Don't count on them, don't hold your breath!
Give to others only as much as you can give without stripping yourself down to depletion.

My hobbies give me a head rush, a feeling of satisfaction, a feeling of happiness. Giving to myself vs expecting others to give to me. They may or may not. It isn't their job to insure your happiness! It's YOUR job!

While I DO write poetry, it's more of an outlet for emotions than anything. Having always been a writer since the age of 4 years, it's stuck with me.

Needlework came along in my very early 20s, it's a passion for me. As an unschooled giver, I gave some beautiful needlework pieces to many people. 
Probably, 75% of the recipients didn't appreciate the time, the care & artistic expression I gave to them. Most of them probably didn't understand the many hours of love I had put into them.
To give mention, there are several people who DO appreciate the needlework gifts I gave, they still cherish it, to this day.

FITNESS! Not the "fitness pizza in mah mouf!" Ha ha! Fitness & living the healthy, fitness lifestyle does a lot of good for me. It gives back to me as its' own reward.

It was up to me to grow, gain understanding, then, learn to either not give at all or only give selectively.
Blaming others for their lack of appreciation is futile.
Taking personal responsibility for actions of giving or not giving is key.
Personal power, Skippy!
Healthy boundaries, Sparky!

Happy life, heroes!

Tschuss!