Who was she?

One phrase will be a real give away. Are you ready?

Candle in The Wind

Did you guess?

Three husbands, 3 divorces.

Her real name was Norma Jeane Mortenson. She was born to a woman who had so many difficulties. Those difficulties were passed on to Norma Jeane. 

Marilyn Monroe

Yep, in the prior post, it's difficult to believe all those little known facts about Marilyn. She has been imitated, studied, envied, talked about, missed, cried over, wondered about. All, after her all too early passing on in 1962. People who never knew her have written songs about her, created artwork in her image. Quite amazing!

Knowing my love, yes love, for Norma, someone once told me he knew someone who looked just like Norma Jeane. I happened to see her while grocery shopping. HAH!

The girl had fake boobs, no butt, brown eyes,limp, over dyed brown hair. 
Her skin was caked with makeup to camouflage the dull gray cast, probably from smoking, drinking too much, not enough water.
After talking to her the stark lack of resemblance was more pronounced. She was messed up by life, yes, however, the girl blames everyone for everything that ever went wrong in her life. She foisted the responsibility for her own personal happiness, her own personal safety off on others. She gave away her own personal power, her self worth to others. 
She should have spent the money for makeup & cosmetic surgery on a good counselor, psychotherapy.It would have helped her more.

She was 36 and already had face wrinkles, a sour attitude, only allowing herself to become more damaged by poor choices.

Definitely nothing like Norma.

Norma had bright blue eyes, brown hair that was bleached blond. Norma's body was only touched by a scalpel when she had to have an emergency appendectomy. 
She also spent a great deal of time in psychotherapy. By the time she passed on, she had healed the hurt of a very turbulent childhood. She looked better than ever, felt strong & in control of her own career, had her own film company, bought her own house. She had also tracked down the white baby grand piano on which she had been given piano lessons on when she learned to play.

Norma had 2 cosmetic surgeries. Had a slight bump on the end of her nose shaved off & an implant in her chin.

That's it.

Norma Jeane was a beautiful soul who had lived through more than her share of tragedy. She was very sensitive, had deep abandonment issues. Very intelligent. Kind hearted to a fault. She loved deeply, felt everything deeply. BOY! I can identify with that!

It ended up being her undoing.

I would have liked to've known you, but I was just a kid. Your candle burned out long ago. Your legend never did.

~ Sir Elton John

As 2016 rolls in, love & luck y'all!

Who was she?

She was the same age as Queen Elizabeth of GB
Her favorite color was white
She only went to school up to 10th grade
By the time she was ten years old she played piano beautifully.

She loved animals, little children and gardening.

Cooking, sewing & keeping a house clean were enjoyable to her.

When she wasn't working she enjoyed reading.

Literature classes at UCLA inspired her to study philosophy 

Exercising daily was very important to her.

She died decades before her mother did.

Being the 2nd woman to start her own film company won respect 

She converted to Judaism in 1956

Her IQ exceeded 160 ~ that's genius level 
She wore prescription spectacles, didn't like to wear them
Mariah Carey bought her white baby grand piano

Who do you think she was? Any guesses?

Tune in next time.  :)

Matthew

Matthew 

What is it about the name? Its meaning is "Gift from God". The guys I have known who were named Matthew were really exceptional people. The first boy I ever saw naked. I was only a very innocent 12, he was 18. It was by accident! He was so...gorgeous, rugged, with a gleaming smile. He was at the private beach behind his parents home, skinny dipping. Just casually walking up out of the water wearing nothing except a smile! I was frozen with shock, awe.....something else, too. Hmm.
He looked at me, puzzled, "What ? You look like you never saw a naked guy, before!....o shit! You haven't, have you?"
Nodding my head, no. Still too shocked to speak. He had his clothes on, now. He was very contrite.

Then there's my favorite cousin, Matthew. Such an accomplished man. Deep compassion, great sense of humor. He's very special.

Matthew, who I dated for a few months after I had been in Hawai'i for 6 months. He made me feel as if I was so important. He called me "precious". Brought white roses every time we went out. He went back to Colorado on leave, had a ons with his ex from 
10th-12th grade. She was preggo, he felt he had to do the right thing, which was to marry her. The 14 page letter he wrote to me, was gut wrenching. He did the right thing. I burned the letter that night. I heard the baby was stillborn & he committed suicide later.

Then there was Matthew, who I knew briefly, following divorcing an abusive male. I was a mess, he was a mess. He was incredibly cognizant that we were both in a bad place. He was newly divorced as was I. We were both deeply lonely.
No sex, however, many nights of good conversation after dinner, all night, fireside, in my townhouse.

Recently, when a GF visited, taking her out for a birthday dinner, our server was so attentive. Just 19......so charmingly attractive. Of course his name was Matthew. 

What else could it possibly be???

Today 

Hello out there! Whoever you are, wherever you are.

Welcome 

Today has a good vibe, feels like a bottle of bubbles or a can of that pressurized whipped cream. Yup! That feeling. 
Maybe it's because of a good night of sleep with very sweet dreams. So wonderful when that happens.
Subsequently my daily workout was quite sweet!
The light fracture in my foot is healing, though, still painful. Love my workouts, so, am pushing through the pain, ignoring it. Have increased 3 minute planks to 5 minutes. Love the challenge! 

Going easy on my right foot during side plank makes me feel like a testicle. Soft, weak, floppy, easily damaged. At the same time, using any reason I can think of to work out vs any excuse to not go.
Today?
Awesome workout.
5 minute plank
30 minute treadmill, 15 incline, 4 mph
5 minute plank
30 minutes elliptical 15 resistance, distance - 3.6 miles 
45 minute strength train
1 hour yoga for cool down 

Feels fantastic! Am not a super girl, however, am super motivated & feeling stronger every day. No workout supplement needed today. :)

Personally, it's my wish that more people would catch on, start cleaning up their unhealthy eating habits. If they would start exercising every day, they would feel so good! 
Big pharm, hospitals, doctors would lose a whooole lotta cheddar!
Can't have that, can we?
Keep the sheeples obese, blind & scared. 
Not this girl!
Many of my life practices may seem odd because they're different yet very natural. Some of my little secrets?

Home made toothpaste. 1 cup organic extra virgin coconut oil, 1 teaspoon baking soda, 10 drops food grade peppermint oil. Store in an airtight container. Dip a dry toothbrush to get a pea sized amount on your toothbrush. Start brushing as usual, wet the toothbrush if you wish. No need to refrigerate. 

Using raw unfiltered honey to wash my face. Rinse face with warm water. Leave it wet. Squeeze a quarter size amount into one hand, rub palms todether. Massage your face in a circular motion with the honey. Face, neck & chest. Rinse with warm water. Sounds weird, I know, yet totally effective, softening, nourishing to my skin.

Those are the only "secrets" (that are no longer secrets) to share. :)

As is my usual habit, I'm watching The History Channel on my smart TV while crafting gifts for loved ones.

Cold, rainy day. Ideal for indulging in sedentary practices.

Until next time, be well.

All i ever wanted .....

Only ever wanted to be cared about, to be loved, REALLY LOVED. No hidden agenda, no emotional lies (saying i love you to get laid etc etc ) or factual lies (marital status, intent). Just one guy who actually truly cares about me, for me. No more, no less. A single, emotionally available white guy who is available to be a friend first, more, if the chemistry & timing is copacetic.

Seems that a person such as this could exist, could want a debt free, anti-drama girl in his life. A girl who would make his life better, happier, yes.

Hasn't happened.

The last time I felt loved was when my maternal grandfather was alive.

Long time ago.

It may or may not happen again.

IDK

36

Is this a magical number? Some sort of common denominator of a times up mortality?

So many beloved celebrities as well as non celebrities seem to expire at the age of 36.

Beauty, fame, depression, boredom, disappointment, resurrection, infidelity, libidinous, stardom 

All of these seem to play a role.

Have yet to succumb, personally.

Stay tuned.

So much love, So much pain

Can a person have one without the other? It seems they coexist in a rather sick, twisted symbiotic dance of fools. 

A life without love is, indeed a bland existence, though the heart beats, the other organs function as if only patiently existing until death eventually occurs.

And pain? What is pain to one person could be experienced as pleasure to another. Ya gotcherself quite a can of worms, there!

It seems that there has to be a balance of these elements for life to be enough challenge. It should remain stimulating with enough warm fuzzy to reward rising to the duel of wits or strength or both!

Personally? I like a bit of a challenge. Take notice I didn't say I love a challenge as well as saying a mere bit, as in just a little.

My life has been far too laden with challenge, love, not so much. It's the way life has played out.

Oftentimes, I will make acquaintance with someone who has been showered with love starting with their birth then continuing on for their entire lives. Yet, they simply see it as ordinary.  Unfortunately, this sort of charmed state of being is more rare.

Looking upon these fortunate souls stirs more curiosity in me than anything. Envy, resentment as well as similar common human reactions are a waste of time, energy. Fruitless fodder.

In an attempt at personal growth for self discovery, watching this sort of person is quite fascinating to me. From a safe, respectful distance, of course. Never intruding, never in a stalkerish manner. Giving respectful obedience to laws, privacy, etcetera.

An example?

Sure!

During High School, there was a classmate who seemed to have it all & have it together. I was very shy & quiet, I began watching her. Watching her mannerisms, watching how others reacted to her.

It was so fascinating! Deciding to practice her moves at home in front of a mirror to see what they looked like on me, I varied them slightly to look more natural before I tried the moves in public. 

Mostly, it looked silly, at first.

More practice.

Better!

Variations.

Even better!

Most of it didn't stick with me permanently. The mannerism that stuck was the way she did a kinda bouncy glide when going up stairs.

The first time I did it in public where other students were around, it was a success! One of the popular girls looked back at me, smiled and told me I had a "super cute" way of going up stairs.

My claim to fame! Ha ha!

This began my fascination with people watching. A little more love, a little less pain.

Emerge

A few weeks ago, I found out about this awesome supplement. A guy who works out as much as I do (okay, he works out more!) told me about it. He's no one I would ever date, however, he offered to give me some awesome workout tips.

There was a catch.

I had to have dinner with him.

So, my rules are, public place, daylight hours.

We went to a nice casual restaurant. He had some really good tips, interesting fitness information. Still, he was no one I would date, there was no chemistry from my point of view.

The most useful, the most interesting information he gave me was about a workout supplement I had not previously heard of. He talked it up & talked it up. I went home looked for it online. Holy shla-moly! Expensive stuff!
When I saw him again, he offered to give me a container of it, only if, yeah, I had dinner with him, AGAIN! UGH!
One more dinner & I could get a new, sealed container of it in the flavor I wanted. YAY!

Have to say, it is an incredible workout supp. For awhile, now, my supp of choice has been Redline. Usually in capsule form. It's for those days when energy is low, a push is needed.
The drawbacks of Redline, in my experience:
1. Extreme let down as soon as it wears off
2. The jitters!
3. It messes up my sleep cycles
4. Have to cycle off for 2 weeks every 4 weeks ~ No picnic!
5. Causes extreme depression when cycling off
6. Pre-dosed, so there's no way to take 1/2 doses

That's the dirty 1/2 dozen. Just in my own experience.

This new supp. :

1. Delivers a steady stream of result
2. Effects taper off, no sudden drop
3. Sound sleep at night
4. No jitters, no nausea, no headache
5. Powder form, so, easy to adjust intake
6. 12 different flavors
7. No need to cycle off
8. Prolonged effects for entire workout
9. Sold in greater quantity, more bang for a buck!
10. Flavor is good without after taste
11. More vitamins & nutrients than most supplements

So, to sum it up, no need to go out with the guy again, got my information & product. It really is a good supp. No more Redline for me. VPX Sports was slowly phasing Redline out anyway. Am not one to worry much about things I can't do anything about. Usually, it's best to go with the flow (to a certain extent) realizing that to worry is a waste of time, things will work their own way out in the time they are supposed to.

So far, it's working.

Fitness is my passion, I see little changes all the time. Whatever I can use (legal, moral, etc) to contribute to my fitness goals, is good!

This is good. Really, really good!

Sky above me, Earth below me, Fire within me

We all have fire within us, don't we? 

To one degree or another? 

On a scale of 1 - 5? 1 - 10? 
Hmm. Humans, I think are a bit more complex than those limiting scales. 
Maybe 1 - 100 or even 1 - 500 would be a more accurate scale.

With 1 being almost comatose and 500 being a Spartan Warrior, always in battle mode, where do you think you would be?
It's tough to say, without sounding narcissistic, without putting oneself under an uncomfortable mental microscope.

Maybe, we are all at different rates at different times in our lives or through out different phases in life. As a child, being unaware of the danger in the world is common. A person may recklessly dart out in front of a car while joyfully enjoying the speed of pedaling a bicycle so fast the wind is singing past ears in which hearing is so stimulated, it usurps all else.

As a teenager, rebelling against authority of parents, teachers, even law enforcement personnel is fairly common. Sometimes the lesson is learned, sometimes the limits are tested over and over, disregarding consequences.

It's a delicate balance, isn't it?

Keeping the fire of a joyful spirit alive, well into adulthood, while tempering it enough so as to fit in, in a world of rules, laws, norms.

Yes, I know of this struggle. 

I was painfully shy as a child in an abusive, dysfunctional home. While subjecting myself to the discipline of military basic training, the shy girl became minimized. The fiery spirit was awakened.

Rut roh!

Of all the career fields I could have chosen, I chose Law Enforcement.
A male dominated, strict, fire tempering career field. Not exactly the best fit for a personality such as mine was, yet, it's what I did.

My mother was a rebellious spit-fire with bright red curly hair. She thumbed her nose at parents, rules, anything that didn't suit her fiery temperament. She also ended up paying the price for it.

Her life.

I like to think that I have just enough of her intelligence, her fire, her inventiveness, while having the maturity to choose a better path.
I have strawberry blond hair. Not exactly the light blond of my German Grandmother, not exactly the fiery red of my mother.

Somewhere in there is the happy medium. The happy medium of being a kind, compassionate sweetheart, while also being one to stand up for myself. Keep my mental-physical-emotional boundaries. A sweetheart while being far from a door mat.

If you don't want to be a door mat, don't lay down.

Phrasing this in the positive:

If you wish to be respected, have a spine, stand up for yourself.

See that? *smile*

People don't like it when a person stands up for themselves. At least, not in the moment. They want their own way, most of us, do. Yet, where is the fun in a person who allows anyone to walk all over them. The truth is, it's ultimately no fun for anyone.

With my strawberry blond hair, big green eyes, only 5'3", I look like an easy target. Well, that's a mistake. I'm a small town country girl, I look like a classic girl next door. Am well aware of this, it's been pointed out enough times.
Yet, I'm a survivor, a fighter, a lover, a patriot, a dreamer, I think very deep, I love with my whole heart, had to cut that shizz out! lol

Thoughts of suicide also turn around inside my brain, then, the fighter takes over. Hopefully, the fighter will keep winning as the suicide season is here for me. Being alone at Christmas is so hard. No one really cares enough about me to care that I am alone on Christmas Day as I have been for the last 3 years if I didn't shell out the $$ to take a trip somewhere, where it doesn't matter. Places such as Las Vegas, NV, Honolulu, HI, or, even out on a very very long hike if the weather permits. 

Still, the injustice of having given so much to 4 ungrateful offspring, having welcomed single people into the family home so many times for so many years. Yet, I am on the other side with no one caring enough as I had cared for others for so many years.
It sucks.
So, I allow the fighter to win, yet again, this year. I super clean my home as a gift to myself. I avoid the Christmas songs, the "Merry Christmas" trilling that is everywhere. I tell myself, that it's okay, even though it isn't.

Oh, I could have someone in my life if I were willing to just settle. I settled for a lesser life than I deserved at 21, I won't settle again.

A Spartan Warrior comforts herself, makes her own happiness, stays strong, does what is needed to survive. She fends off the wild beasts in the form of males that would try to take advantage of her desire to be loved. She gives up some extraneous possessions in trade for money which would give her security. She focuses on that which evokes happiness, soft, sweet, feminine things. She trains her body to be strong, healthy, resilient, lets the sweat become her armor. The magical sweat of sweet release of endorphins. 

Guess who is happier, stronger, more lean, wiser than last year?

THIS GIRL!

Have you ever lost control?

This could apply to anyone, anything, any time, anywhere. Was it scary, in your experience? Going into a tail-spin as though driving in cold weather where the roads are icy, as careful as you are, the tires aren't gripping the road sufficiently, it's beyond your control to keep the car on the road.

Here's another scenario.

Although your relationship with your spouse started out great, one event after another, after another, then, still more. It's tough to figure out how to fix it. They are spending way too much money, they don't want sex with you, they care more about a "new" person in their life, just as they used to care about you. It's out of your control. Irretrievably broken. Nothing you do or say makes a difference.

Yet another instance is when you thought you knew what would kill the weeds in your garden. Using pesticides may kill the weeds, yet, may also kill your plants and put chemicals you don't want in it.

As much as you pull the weeds out, daily, they continue to grow back. Life takes over, then, it becomes 1 day since pulling out weeds, then it turns into 3 days, then a week, when you realize the weeds have taken over, it feels like such a monumental task, it causes one to just give up.

These are three different scenarios, yet, they exude the same feeling of hopelessness, defeat, sometimes even depression.

This was the best way I could describe for you, how it felt when I began gaining weight and it was beyond my control to stop it. There were many factors, yet, the responsibility for my own health, well being, for the care of my body, is ultimately, my own. 

It's personal responsibility AKA owning my own shizz. :)

When a person has never experienced the hopelessness of having their weight pile on beyond their control, it's hard to explain to someone who has never had it happen to them. Possibly the prior scenarios will evoke a recognition from someone who HAS had the scary experience of sliding on ice. Maybe facing a divorce (UGH!) or trying to succeed at gardening only to fail miserably enough to make them give up in despair. 

For awhile, I did give up in despair, allowed myself to become quite porky.

Double & even triple UGH!

It was very frightening, however, nothing I tried seemed to work. I was also very very busy. When I wasn't busy, I was exhausted. The "ME" time I got was at night when everyone else went to bed. I devoted that time to relieve some stress by creating beautiful hand sewn clothing for my 4 kiddos. Sometimes creating beautiful needlework pieces to adorn our home, make gifts for others or anything, really.

Anything except exercise.

I was quite sedentary. Some would see it as fat, dumb & happy! Ha ha! 

Not dumb, yet the others apply quite well. I was content, as the weight piled on. When my younger sister died from complications of obesity, it should have been a wake-up call. It wasn't.

I still enjoyed daily sex with my husband (ex-huzz, now! YAY!)

My home was clean, my kiddos were happy.

What was the problem?

The problem was that my health was suffering & would most likely fail if I continued to live a sedentary life without cleaning up my diet, beginning to exercise regularly.

So, I began. At first, it was grueling, painful, I hated it. I kept pushing myself.

As my weight dropped off, my marriage crumbled. He was a very jealous person, although he put me down for gaining weight, he, now found fault with everything else to assuage his deep insecurities.

I pushed on.

It was a slow process.

I kept pushing myself.

The divorce finalized.

I used the happiness of being free to push myself harder.

Slowly, I began changing what I was eating. Doing research, finding what worked. Changing everything up to get to my goal of getting control of my weight. Changing up my workouts when I went to a plateau.

Oh yeah!

The formerly dreaded ~ PLATEAU!

I say, formerly dreaded because, now, I actually like it when I hit a plateau. For anyone who doesn't know what a plateau is. It's when your workout becomes so easy that it no longer feels like work. It's when you don't see any more new muscle development. Sometimes, it can be as simple as not losing any weight for a long period of time such as 1 month. I don't wait a month. Just sayin'! Ha ha!

After having been back into fitness for almost 12 years, now, I can feel a plateau right around within 48 hours of it happening. When I feel it, I know I have to change everything up. Change the foods I'm eating, change my workout. Do it different. 

Recently, I started using free weights to build strength, to build muscle. The feeling of strength is so empowering!

The feeling in my body which I felt at the age of 19 has come back. tight arms, tight butt, tight legs, tight chest. My abs are not at the tightness yet, but, they will be. I will push until they are.

I haven't weighed myself since October. Stepping on the scale, today, I have lost 10 lbs. WOW! That makes me a happy happy happy girl!

In the past month I have concentrated on veggies & protein. Now, I am a very easy to please, girl. I could eat the same thing every day, wear the same clothes, every day. I would be content with that. For awhile I would use 2 - 5.5 oz cans of tuna & chop up whatever veggies happened to be in my fridge. Even some fruit if I wanted it.

PLATEAU!

So, I changed it up. 

1 big handful of baby spinach + 1 roma tomato + 1 avocado + 1/2 bell pepper + 2 chopped boiled eggs. 1 salmon fillet, pan seared.

It worked!

Bye bye plateau!

Also, on 1 November, I started juicing 1 whole lemon, peel et al! First thing in the morning, brush teeth, 16 oz water, drink the lemon, brush teeth again, out the door to the gym.

It's working!

Oh, and, in 2004, I was in a size 24 jeans, now? My size 8s are loose on me. I have European & Native American genetics. I would have to starve to be a size 0. Not going there! Being healthy, first & foremost while getting down to a healthy, comfortable weight is most important.

Hope this has inspired people out there.

I have a kind, loving heart, always happy to help others.

Have a great day!

(I know I will! :)  )

Are you happy? Do you want to be?

Loaded questions, right?

Maybe

I decided a long time ago, like 10 minutes ago, to be happy. I also decided 5 minutes ago to be happy. Then, 1 minute ago, I decided to be happy, again. See what I just did, there?

Deciding to be happy is a choice people can make. It sounds unrealistic, yet, what does a person have to gain from wallowing in anxiety, misery, negativity, grudge holding? The answer is, they don't gain anything, yet, they most definitely reap the countermeasure reward.

When I decided this, to be happy, I started noticing that people are trained from an early age to think in negativity. Have worked on myself to think, speak, act, in positives. Since I went along with the crowd in the negativity for so long, I still find myself having to self correct.

Pick up a magazine, a newspaper, open any online news feed, you will see it. The wording is mostly in negatives. Children are trained from an early age in negativity.

"Don't touch that!"
"You can't have that"
"There is no Santa Claus"
"If you don't clean your room..."
"We can't afford that so you can't have it"
"You're not going to go to that party tomorrow"

Dr. James Dobson first drew my attention to this, thankfully, while my kiddos were still in their formative years. I'm grateful for his good advice.

It began like this, speaking to my kiddos in positives instead of negatives, it made a huge difference.

N for negative
P for the way I corrected it to positive.

N - Time to get out of the pool, we have to go home
P - It's time to have popsicles!
(they knew they had to leave the pool if they wanted popsicles & they knew the popsicles were at home!)

N - Don't touch that! (as in, going through a store with many breakables in Kaiserslautern,Germany)
P - Fold your arms, touch with your eyes.

N - There were 6 in the family and 7 days when dishes needed to be washed.
P - We also had a dog, Sammy, who was very loved. The 7th day, it was Sammy's turn to do the dishes. We all loved Sammy & wanted to help him by doing the dishes together when it was his turn. Most family members did dishes together on that day. Some opted out, yet, it didn't matter. As long as the dishes were done, that was the whole enchilada. :)


At times, I did slip slightly into negative talk at times, yet, I'm human, we all are. Giving it your best effort is really what matters.

People who know me, know the tragedy which has occurred  in my life, remark at how positive I am.

Well....thank you. Thank you very much! (channeling Elvis, ha ha!)

To one degree or another, everyone has hills & valleys in life. Sometimes, they feel like they are in an abyss and then, later, are flying high! Wait.....that's a mental/emotional disorder. Hmm.

So, scratch that. Am sure you get the gist.

Part of being human is to have highs, lows, tragedy, triumph, joy, pain.

Staying in the positive I will only say that & leave it. When we re-tell a tragic event in our lives over and over, we are giving the negativity power. We all do it to some extent. Yet, we can minimize the negative, like blowing out a lit match vs putting out a house fire.
See what I just did? *smile*

Deepak Chopra is an East Indian philosopher who I listen to a lot. His words make so much sense. Bringing order to chaos, his fresh perspectives are very interesting. At night, when I lay in my bed, feeling the luxuriousness of  my soft sheets against my skin, the warmth of the electric blanket & heated mattress pad, lulling me into slumber, I think back to when I first woke that morning of that day. I recall every positive event of the day, then let the happiness of that feeling come to me again. Saying thank you, that was lovely! To each event I recall.
This practice, alone, makes a big difference in the amount of happiness felt.

When I see a bird on the fence outside my home, closer than usual and singing! Enjoyment of that which is so simple yet less common, it makes me happy.

Yup, ha ha. I am pretty easy to please.

So, these little things that activate the happy feelings can make up as well as counteract whatever negativity may fall upon my day. Negativity is part of life, yet, so is positivism!

While my creative juices have been flowing,  I have neglected my house cleaning. Have to admit that, the disorder has started to get to me, so, today, I decided that after my workout, after running errands, after my daily activities are done, I will give myself 2 hours to clean. With a time limit, it's easier for me, it just works.

Setting my world right? Maybe. :)

Some helpful words, from Dr. Chopra, that have helped me, are the following:

Are you feeling depressed? Hopeless? Sad? Lonely? Alone?

Go home
Make your bed
Dust your furniture
Clean your kitchen
Sweep and mop your floors

Do you feel better?

Good!

Do 2 loads of laundry, start to finish. Wash, dry, iron if needed, then fold, if needed, put them away in the dresser or the closet or wherever you would store them if company is expected.

Clean your home as if you are expecting some very important people to come over. Really, you are cleaning for that one VIP that this will make an impact upon - yourself!

It's amazing at how having a clean home can make the feeling of happiness bubble up for you.

I know, I have more reasons to be sad & depressed than I do reasons to be happy. This is realistic, to acknowledge the truth, while choosing to be happy. This is the mechanics of it.

I choose, this day, to be happy.

You can choose, too.

Choose happiness. Happy, positive thoughts, positive events.

You will see how this positivism changes your life!

Aloha!